*** This post was supposed to be published in mid-June, but for some reason (pregnancy brain???), it never uploaded. So here it is, better late than never, my last blog post as a mom of three.
If you’ve ever been pregnant or trapped in the vicinity
of a pregnant woman, you may recall that one of the nasty side effects of third
trimester is extreme crankiness. So as
not to burden you all with my recent irritability, I haven’t posted for over a
month, but I just can’t hold it in any longer.
So here you have it, my top pet peeves, in no particular order. Please feel free to add your own in the
comments…misery loves company!
1. Drivers who don’t use turn signals. Equally annoying are drivers who use turn
signals but then leave them on indefinitely after lane changes
2. Long toenails. I mean, ewww.
Get some clippers!
3. Hashtags, acronyms, abbreviations and
other ways you people try to make me feel old
4. Drivers who speed through school
zones when kids are obviously present
5. Drivers who slow down for school zones
when school isn’t in session
6. Unattended children at swimming pools
7. Dandelions
8. Drivers who stop at yellow lights
9. Drivers who run red lights
10. People who pay for checks at the grocery
or retail stores
11. Parents who let their kids touch things
on restaurant buffets
12. Varicose veins
13. Drivers who go the speed limit in the far
left lane
14. Drivers who go under the speed limit
anywhere. It’s possible I’m not the most
patient or tolerant driver on the road.
15. Programmable thermostats
16. People who bike slowly on narrow roads at
rush hour when there is a sidewalk right there
17. Teens who drive golf carts down sidewalks
18. Teenagers in general
19. Dog farts
20. People who take forever to tell a
story. Get to the point already!
21. Drivers who text while driving
22. Cigarette butts
23. Special News Reports. If I wanted to see the breaking news, I could
check it on my phone without interrupting whatever show I actually want to
watch
24. Homework for elementary schoolers that
obviously requires parental participation
25. Short cell phone battery life
26. Humidity
27. People who back into parking spaces. Unless you’re robbing a bank, this is
pointless.
28. Drivers who wait for someone else to get
into a car and back out so they can have the parking space even though the lot
isn’t full. Stop making the rest of us
wait so your lazy butt doesn’t have to walk ten extra yards!
29. Expired coupons
30. Newspapers thrown over the sprinkler head
31. Sleet.
Either rain or snow, Atmosphere.
Make up your mind!
32. Wasps. The stinging kind.
33. Comments on online news articles. Don’t you people have friends you could
discuss these topics with? Why do you
assume random strangers care what you think?
34. Expired packaged food. Who has time to check those dates at the
store?
35. Strangers who ask if I’m having twins
36. Finding unflushed poop in every toilet in
the house
37. Cat litter
38. Drivers who don’t wave thank you after
you slow down to let them in your lane
39. Dog poop at playgrounds. Pick it up you lazy SOB!
40. When my phone autocorrects certain words
to “duck” and “ducking.” As if anyone
ever has intentionally written either of those words in a text.
41. Stores that email you multiple times a
day to inform you of a short-term discount.
One notification is enough, thanks.
42. Tiny font
43. People who use their cell phones during
movies, even if not talking. That light
is distracting!
44. Mostly empty ketchup bottles
45. Mosquito bites
46. Cursive handwriting. Unless you’re signing your name, just print
and spare the rest of us the pain of trying to decipher your scribbles.
47. Commercials when you’re watching a show
online
48. Parents who leave children who are
obviously sick at preschool
49. Organic food. The sheer fact that it exists increases my
guilt about the hot dogs and pop tarts my kids just ate.
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