Today I am not writing about
parenting or the humor in modern suburban life. This is a political post.
There, you’ve been warned. But please keep reading—this is not an endorsement for
any one candidate or view, but it may just help you feel better.
Today, Americans everywhere are
hungover. Some of us literally, whether from celebrating or lamenting, and some
of us are just so fatigued from the late night election coverage that we feel
hungover. As a result of that, I’ve seen many emotionally-charged comments
about the election that remind me of the sort of thing my kids say when they
need a nap.
And I will tell you the same thing I
told my children when I informed them this morning about the election results:
it will be okay.
Here’s the thing: Donald Trump is
not America. Trump is one American. There are some 325 million other Americans.
I’m not going to pretend that one person can’t make a difference in our world,
because we all know they can. But if Trump can make a difference, so can each
of the other 325 million of us.
Trump has pledged to make America
great again. I happen to think America is already pretty awesome, but with some
room for improvement. If you believe Trump is going to make America great
again, fine. If you don’t, that’s fine too. Because here’s the thing- Trump is
one person. One person cannot make or break America. But 325,000,000 people?
Yeah, we can.
This election seemed to divide the
nation more than any other in recent history. There was a lot of nastiness in
this election, but because of that, this election offered us the opportunity to
teach our children many valuable lessons, including the importance of democracy
and exercising our right to vote, the importance of treating everyone with
dignity and respect, the importance of thinking about how your words will
affect others before you speak them aloud, and the importance of accepting
everyone’s differences and beliefs. The problem is, I don’t think we as a
nation have learned any of those lessons.
I have heard many who oppose Trump
express their feeling that Trump doesn’t value them because they’re female,
homosexual, Muslim, or Hispanic. I understand completely how people get that
impression and to be honest, it bothers me greatly that our President doesn’t
appear to value all of our citizens equally.
I have heard many others take this view
one step further, and say that they also feel anyone who supports Trump or even
voted for Trump doesn’t value or respect them as a person. And again, I can
follow this reasoning. To those of you who feel this way, that’s okay, you are
entitled to your feelings. But I happen to know many people who I am certain
have nothing but love in their hearts for all of these groups of people, who
still felt compelled to vote for Trump for one reason or another. And to
criticize Trump for failing to respect the differences in all of us Americans
while refusing to respect opinions of other Americans who voted differently
than you strikes me as a bit hypocritical. So does criticizing his tendency to stereotype people right before you say only uneducated people voted for him.
I’d venture to guess most Trump supporters
didn’t vote for him because they hate women, for example. But they might have
voted for him because they’re nervous about losing gun rights or don’t like
Clinton’s health care policies. Do you have to agree with their opinions? NO!
But are others entitled to those opinions? Well, yes. That’s kind of the whole
point of democracy.
It’s too late to change the election
results, so let’s stop the campaigning. Let’s stop the hate, and let’s move on.
I did not wait in line to vote in a crowded gym with multiple antsy children
and a full bladder for 2.5 hours so that we could all whine about how horrible
everything is now. The candidate I voted for did not win this particular election, but I don't see how badmouthing everyone who disagrees with me will help.
I don’t expect everyone to stop commiserating
on Facebook about the election. But after you complain about the bad image you
worry Trump gives America, think about how you can change the way the world
sees Americans. You can’t control the way Trump speaks about women, but you can
control the way you speak. You can teach your children that words are powerful
and that they not only reflect on the character of the speaker but also affect
the listener. You can make America greater.
When my kids get home from school
today and are still anxious about the election, I plan to remind them that
whether or not the next four years are great for America is up to us—the 325
million Americans, not the one guy who got elected. And I plan to tell them
that they can do their part every day if they follow this simple recipe: Treat
everyone with respect, whether they look different from you, think differently
from you or even vote differently than you. Acknowledge and celebrate all of
our differences. Be empathetic. Be kind. It starts with you, not Trump.
